So here is the absolute truth as I see it:
*Right now, life is pretty dang good. Aside, of course, from wishing I was slightly less busy with work though it is trending in the right direction. So really, all is good.
*Concurrently, I am not at all happy with my body. But I’m not sure how riled up I feel like getting about this.
One of the great things I took away from the Everyday Paleo Seminar was the idea that if you aren’t managing stress, nothing else you manage is going to be super effective. I am a living breathing example of this right now, and while my stress management is also trending in the right direction, I can’t help but feel annoyed by the fact that I’m still exercising, still eating fairly well, and stock piling ALL OF THE FAT, EVERYWHERE. Perhaps that’s a slight exaggeration, but only slight.
My natural tendency is to write down some goals, make a plan of how to get there and then execute at all costs. But something about that just feels like it might be…well, a little stressful, right? I am not dying to put another thing on my plate, but I keep thinking about the other thing I took away from the Everyday Paleo Seminar and that was the idea that we should base our eating (and drinking, for that matter) on things that help us look, feel and perform at our best. I am pretty damn happy with my bodies performance in life right now (I’m alive! I’m still PRing at the gym! I’m sleeping well! My stress level is getting back to normal!). But the look and feel part — well, those definitely needs some improvement.
I wish I could remember where I read this recently (I’m sure it was on a blog) but the jist was that when it comes to food, focus on addition and not subtraction. Don’t focus so much on avoiding everything awful, but rather make it a priority to focus on adding in the good stuff first. I thought that was such a great way to frame things. And for the past few months I have been doing just that: if I can squeeze some kale into my smoothie, I’m doing it. If I can have 3 vegetables with dinner instead of two — I’m on it! Water instead of coffee? BOOM. I’ve got the “addition” pretty dialed in, and yet I am still unhappy with look and feel. (Back Fat — seriously needs to EFF OFF!) So now I want to think a little bit about subtraction.
My first instinct was to do a Whole 30, but I certainly don’t want to make a habit of saying “I feel fat! Do a Whole 30!” That sounds a little yo-yo diet to me, right? Also, I have written about my experiences of doing a Whole 30 and there is no doubt that it is a challenge. Am I in the right mind frame to take on this challenge?
But here are the other facts: I am the type of person who actually finds relief in some rules/framework. Part of my stress lately comes from that fact that I am not making the time to take care of myself. And usually when I am in the midst of a Whole 30, I not only end up prioritizing cooking in a way that I love, but I also feel really free from the whole “Should I be make a bad decision and have this ice cream tonight?” type of anxiety because there are really only two choices during the Whole 30: Commit or Quit. Committing is more challenging, yes — but also in many ways, so much simpler.
Anyway…no resolution just yet, and definitely no commitment. My biggest takeaway from the Whole 30 has always been that it is the little things that make such a huge difference, and I would like to see some huge differences here shortly. But we are out of town this weekend (and coincidentally staying in walking distance from the best donuts in California) so something tells me I may feel a bit more passionate about when we return? Maybe I’ll take my copy of It Starts With Food with me for a little light vacation reading. I’ll keep you posted.
Any of you doing a Whole 30 soon?