I’d assume you were laughing with me — but I’m not actually laughing

Can you believe it? We all survived!

Boy this weekend’s sure storm caused quite the stir up here in these parts. With pounding rain and 70 mph winds you would have thought a hurricaine was about to hit Friday afternoon with the way everyone was acting. The thing is then you would have realized that you live in Sacramento and a hurricaine is like practically impossible. Then you would have gone on to realize that the ocean is like practically in a different time zone. Do you hear that muffled laughter? That is the East Coast laughing at you like a gaggle of junior high girls.

With dramatic flair worthy of an Oscar, my office closed down at 2pm on Friday afternoon due to “Extreme Weather Conditions.” It felt like a glorified fire drill and even though it was like Grand Theft Auto getting home, I certainly didn’t let a little rain get in the way of enjoying those extra few hours off. I headed straight the the store and bought all the fixins to have a serious soup party (dude, I bought 7 quarts of Chicken Stock — who does that?) plus a handy dandy duraflame and I was pretty much set. I ended up making a bitchin Roasted Potato and Fennel Soup and some homemade parmesan croutons and spent the evening hanging with Garrett polishing off a bottle of Zinfandel. I’m not gonna lie, if this is what Extreme Weather is all about, I may just be destined to head East.

Saturday morning, on the other hand, was less than stellar. With a little bit of sun peaking through the clouds Garrett and I hedged our bets and headed out to Placerville to pick up our wine club selections at Lava Cap. Yeah, we’re pretty much Last-Minute-Larrys and this weekend was the last weekend you could pick up your case of wine, otherwise you would be relegated to shipping and handling hell. (Basically what I’m telling you here is we’re cheap, and we would rather risk life and limb in a storm than pay shipping and handling. Wanna be our friends?)

So we drive all the way out there and the whole winery was like deadsville. I mean seriously I think I saw a tumbleweed blow by as I was reading the ‘Closed’ sign, which by the way was hanging suspiciously close to another sign proclaiming “Only closed on Easter, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s.” (Um…Dear Lava Cap, Last Saturday was none of those holidays, so you can take your shipping and your handling and your signature of a 21 year old with an ID in the middle of a Wednesday afternoon and SUCK IT! Have a nice day. XOXO Holly) Bet hedging not really working out for us, we got a taste of Mother Nature’s wrath on the drive home and we didn’t even have wine to show for it. HUMPH!

What we did have, however, was excitement in the form of an audio book! AN AUDIO BOOK! I mean could you just die? Who, under 80, listens to audio books? Oh, hang on for a sec, let me put down my LARGE PRINT copy of North and South and just adjust my pocket protector real quick. But seriously, can I just tell you for a minute how audio books are right about to change my life? As someone who is trying to maximize their reading time this year, it is so damn efficient to be reading one book, while simultaneously listening to another book in the car while commuting, running errands, trying to avoid shipping and handling– I mean whatever tickles your fancy, really — IT IS SO EFFICIENT! I can’t tell you how much I’m loving it. On Saturday our fancy happened to be tickled by Anthony Bourdain’s Kitchen Confidential which I highly recommend even though he’s kind of — oh, how do I put it? — a brash asshole. This may or may not be up your alley, but if you have any interest in food or cooking or drugs or sex or catering(?) it really is quite an entertaining read/(listen?). It actually made the sting of Mother Nature’s wrath a little more bearable Saturday afternoon.

Oh, and while we’re discussing what a nerd I am, can I tell you what I did on Saturday night? Well after a delicious dinner with Garrett’s parents, the two of us headed over to Matt and Lisa’s where we played Guitar Hero III — for almost seven hours. SEVEN HOURS. I want you to let that sink in for a minute. Don’t worry, I’ll wait. Yeah, actually now that I think about it, let’s just keep that between you and me, internet, k? In my defense, it was with some fun friends who are equally as cool (hint: nerdy) as us and the most delicious quesadillas on the planet, but can I tell you what the worst part about it was? When I woke up this morning — I WAS SORE!

What has my life come to?

On second thought, don’t answer that.

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